 Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 13:09 |
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I have to risk losing my girlfriend n my current job for studying... ...she loves me all along for two years now and I love her too we don't fake it. Now the problem comes, I must go study medicine abroad and that's very lengthy...she says I should just follow my heart but, she cried since the day I told her that am going till now and she losses weight like nothing. I am afraid she will fail if I go shashi she doesn’t seem strong enough to handle that surge of depression and she is scared of being alone when am away and that I won’t come back for her. What should I do? How can I assure her that am and will be committed to making our long distance relationship work? Please HELP!
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 Re: Draining in love pain |
Kei
Number Posts: 10
Last Post: 08.04.2010, 15:58
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 14:01 |
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I feel your pain brother but before I comment, I want to know the duration of your studies. Yes, long distance relationship doesn't work for these who have that negative perception towards it, and the opposite is definitely true. How did our fathers managed to keep their relationships when they used to work in mines and they only used to go home once in two years to visit their families? Today, we have cellphones, Emails, etc and i believe that technology actually helping us out to be able to contact our loved once in daily basis.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Vmboy sha Chaze
Number Posts: 649
Last Post: 26.01.2012, 12:22
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 14:31 |
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Common 1st and foremost lemme start by thanking you for the positive attitude you are showing.
My dear Common you are showing that you really care for that girl and you hesitate to do evrything that will keep you guys apart. From your lines i can easily tell that this is the sound of someone who is deeply in love and thank you for that for considering the love of your life in everything you do.
Here is my advice:
Life is very difficult and that is what is termed opportunist cost. You have to make tough choices at times.
To be honest by going to study abroad, you are risking your love life since both of you are not sure whether you will overcome the consequences of distance relationship. That is the ugly truth. Your girlfrnd can love you so much, but someone myt convince her to cheat.
So my dear, u have to go abroad knowing all those ugly possibilities, but its just a possibility that myt either happen or not, so my dear just go and study and hope for the best.
But before you go, tell her how difficult it must have been for you to take up that decision and assure her that you will together eat the fruits of your studies when you are back.
i know a lot of ppl who go to an extent of impregnanting their partners just before they go for studies as some kind of security,,, and i dont know whether that is good or not.
SO my dear go to study, but keep the connection while away.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 14:40 |
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Five years eish, with only five visits max...Eeno technology has made communication all easier but it came with its own disadvantages too. E.g. Fycbuk can enable a very good communication, it exposes you to lots of friends but to opportunists too... ...who will tempt you over and over again. And if you're not strong enough your patience will fade gradually away DAMN. Thanks for help.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 14:46 |
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Kei & Vmboy that's for real
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Mr. Skeleton
Number Posts: 58
Last Post: 11.05.2010, 13:13
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 14:54 |
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But common, have you guys tried distance relationship before?
Otherwise am afraid the salt of distance relationship will be too sour for you..
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 15:04 |
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Skeleton, ya. We are in a distance relationship aready but we see each other a lot though there is a town between our towns, it's just a 2h30min drive. But this time it 'll be hell of a distance.
[Post edited by: Common on 03/2/10 3:13 PM]
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Mr. Skeleton
Number Posts: 58
Last Post: 11.05.2010, 13:13
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 15:18 |
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That is good, atleast you have kept the love and have an idea of what distance relationship is. No jwonder why your girl was crying coz she knows that distance love is not a joke. u have to sweat.....
But you have to prepare you future and your kids future so she should understand.
Ndate, just go and study. one day she will be smiling at you when she will see the money you will be earning, and that will be the time you will let her know that life is about risks.
So my dear, even if you are not a risk-taker, the time is now to take a risk.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
M.com
Number Posts: 12
Last Post: 07.02.2010, 12:43
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 19:33 |
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hi there,
i suggest that you do the right thing and go study.
In life everything is opprutunity cost.
Belive me if one day things dont work out for you and your girl you will hate yourself for not having made the choice of futhering your career....
I suggest you talk to her and make her understand that its your future that is at stake here.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
seen
Number Posts: 98
Last Post: 09.08.2011, 11:41
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 19:55 |
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Eish, love love love... yeah right! Go study ma boy, you might choose to keep ur love but anythin can happen 2day or 2mro, u knw how girls ar mos & can be tempted so fast, temptations may come up immediatly aftr u lose ur study opportunity & she can't think back even on how u remained for her (love)... she gona dump u or start doing kaka jst lyk dat.
So, build on ur love nw, convince her dat u gona come for her & thr u only go for study, than kip th communication goin while u away... If she can't understand, than she is being selfish.
[Post edited by: seen on 03/2/10 8:00 PM]
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Black Revolutionary--(MMB)
Number Posts: 1620
Last Post: 06.02.2012, 06:29
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| Wednesday, 03. February 2010 at 21:46 |
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No matter how much she loves you go study bro, go, dont trust a woman
they change like weather, she might stop you from goign to get a nice degree
and when another Nigga comes from abroad with that nice degree he'll grab her from you
so that will be a damn loss. she'll respect you more if you get that degree from overseas
I had a girl i loved truly, she was never happy with my move to overseas but now she dating
some guys who got big degrees from overseas, if i stayed at poly she could have dumped
me for that guy still..be wise bro, yo dreams are your dreams, go for them,
Let only GOD STOP YOU
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Thursday, 04. February 2010 at 09:50 |
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Thanks outies.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
GBZ
Number Posts: 26
Last Post: 28.04.2010, 13:56
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| Thursday, 04. February 2010 at 13:04 |
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Dear brother common, i hope you are lucky if you will get five times visits in five years period.If you really love her with the same credit from her, them steer up the relation and i'm sure you will never lose her.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
M.com
Number Posts: 12
Last Post: 07.02.2010, 12:43
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| Sunday, 07. February 2010 at 12:43 |
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@ SEEN.
UR A 100% RIGHT.
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Dinno
Number Posts: 124
Last Post: 04.12.2010, 13:53
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| Sunday, 07. February 2010 at 14:59 |
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Go 4 it bro, uunona kauhole ondjala
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Common
Number Posts: 18
Last Post: 23.03.2010, 09:18
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| Monday, 08. February 2010 at 09:41 |
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Hheheh!, yaa kauholondjala shili ka
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| Re: Draining in love pain |
Missy N
Number Posts: 23
Last Post: 19.04.2011, 16:12
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| Tuesday, 09. February 2010 at 10:38 |
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If you want ur dreams to come true then u have to stand & work hard to make it become a reality. Dreams don’t just come true on their own u know, so my advice for u bro Common is that u should go out there and just follow ur heart. Common this is you opportunity to out there study, come back and shine with ur degrees bro.
Now in a case where love is involved, the situation becomes tougher and harder, where u now have to really sit down and talk serious facts about this longer long distance relationship that the two of u would be in, so please have her answer questions like (Will she really, really wait for u? not just the waiting in the mouth but serious waiting for someone who would be gone for long time?)
We are talking about u practically moving to another country for quite some time, 5 years is not joke man, though years do go by very fast, both u and ur baby have to be very strong, committed, trustworthy, serious & really willing to wait for one another.
Me, Myself and I, I’m currently in a long distance relationship where the person is on the other side of the world, we communicate each and everyday via smses, calls, emails & etc. And I owe technology a lot of thanks, because the communication that we share on a daily basis just makes our relationship to grow stronger each day, I’m even proud to say that, I’ve been faithful to my man. I know most of u would not believe this but it’s the truth. And I strongly believe that if ur galfriend really loves u then she will also do the right thing which is waiting for u her man. Advice her about the good outcome that u would get when back from ur study, ur living standards and all what u think would contribute to ur relationship becoming a success after 5 years of worth the waiting. 5 years is nothing by the way.
My friend I grantee u that u would find that gal waiting for u at the airport…………….
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